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XXX: Love, SexXx, and Relationships Keep it clean guys. No porn is to be posted here. This forum exists to discuss sexual issues (including relationship issues)...and sex health issues. Enjoy!

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  #1  
Old 07-17-2013
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Default I cheat on my wife

My Cheating Heart



by David Green



What you do behind closed doors is your business, what I do is mine

I am a happily married man.

I love my wife and love having sex.

I love having sex with my wife.

And also with women who are not my wife.

I know how that sounds, and Iím not writing this to recommend or defend what I do. What you do behind closed doors is your business, what I do is mine. I canít stop you from judging me. The only thing I can do is tell my story.
For as long as I can remember, Iíve just never felt the guilt that usually accompanies being intimate with someone who is not your significant other. And I also never feel guilty wanting that person to provide the variety I like and have come to need. There are other guys who self-destruct, who succumb to the urge to tell someone, or plain feel miserable about it afterwards.

Not me. My stance is that you can love your wife, care for your family and still have guiltless sex with other women. Iím not a sociopath, although Iíve always been a bit compulsive. I think I may be a sex addict, although Iím not really sure what that means. I am sure about one thing: I absolutely love women and crave them beyond all reason. I hunger for them. I burn for them. I must have them, and Iíd do almost anything to be with them.
But Iíd never, EVER do anything to hurt my wife. And I realize how that sounds and that many of you will disagree. In fact, Iíve done everything in my power to shield her from my dalliances. I never share my private affairs with anyone and take every precaution to avoid detection. Weíve been together for more than 25 years and she means the world to me. Iím not unhappy or frustrated with our sex life, and the last thing Iíd ever want is to blow up our marriage.
I just need more than she can give.

We live in the well-manicured suburbs of Long Island, where this kind of behavior has been going on since the cavemen first moved into Levittown. Despite this (to say nothing of every other John Updike novel), I know that the great majority of you still find my attitude repellent.
"But what about the risk?" I hear you ask. "What would happen if your wife ever found out? And how would you feel if she was cheating on you?" The short answer is: You can't do what I do if you worry about things that may or may not happen.
Think about someone youíve always wanted to sleep with. Think about their neck, their lips, their legs, whatever most turns you on. Think about how she or he makes you pulse with excitement. Think about the crazy thrill of pursuing your erotic dream. Think about how you canít think of anything else.
This is how I feel when I wake up every morning, fantasizing about having sex with a stranger I met online, a neighbor, or sometimes even my kidís friendsí moms. Itís not very difficult.

Iíll be on the soccer field on Saturday morning watching my son play, while simultaneously scouting for one of the moms, whoís usually there by herself. Iíll slowly make my way over to her with a big, warm smile on my face and it all seems perfectly innocent, although I know better. And so does she.
Maybe sheís unhappy, unfulfilled, vindictive, bored ó whatever her story is, it doesnít matter. The one thing these women have in common is that theyíre hungry for a manís attention. We begin to chat and I can usually make her laugh, and after a few minutes, I may inadvertently touch her hand or shoulder, and itís in that instant when I know if weíll be together in the very near future.

After weíre both completely spent and satisfied, I tell them where my head is at. That I will never fall in love with them, that I will never leave my wife, that my family life is off-limits, and that for this to continue, our affair will be about one thing and one thing only ó scratching each otherís itch.
We meet at cheap hotels right off the expressway, in the back of each otherís cars, more than once in the bathroom of a restaurant a few towns over from where I live. We satisfy each other, again and again and again. And itís generally been some kind of wonderful.

Until itís not.

ďItís notĒ rears its ugly head when they want something that I cannot give ó they want more. It happens frequently and I can always see it coming. They suggest going away to the Hamptons or Montauk for a long weekend and get this hopeful glimmer in their eyes that says, ďI know who you are, but I can change you! I can make you mine!Ē
I was tempted only once. Julie (not her real name, as David Green is not mine) was 10 years younger than me, drop-dead beautiful and was separated from her husband, some schlub who worked on Wall Street. We had met at a concession stand at one of my sonís travel basketball games, and one thing led to another, which then led to off-the-charts, mind-blowing sex. It was like we were plugged into an electrical socket. We went at it for three solid months. Then one day, she called and said that she was reconciling with her schlub husband and that we were done.

I remember coming home that evening and being greeted by my wife, who asked the question that all married couples ask each other most every night: "How was your day?"

ďFine,Ē I answered. ďHow was yours?Ē

Source: http://www.purpleclover.com/relation...6pLid%3D342108
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  #2  
Old 07-18-2013
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Cheating doesn't surprise me anymore.
Maybe in the last year i've seen the really ugly side of cheating and also the fact that I have indeed been cheated on.

It is not something that I stand for but I'm not a saint either.
I'd rather my partner talk to me about what the problem is or what they 'require' so that we can have a mutual agreement. I like to try things before I right them off unless it is just plain fucked up like (i.e. eyeball licking) in that case, fuck you and your dick.

However, where I don't respect what he does (not that he cares that i don't approve) I have to give him credit for his honesty. Knowing himself and not just making up bullshit excuses like, "It was an accident."
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Old 11-13-2013
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i did it relentlessly to my now EX WIFE,the whole time we were dating up until we were married.it wasn't until i went away to a long term rehab for the 2nd time in less than a full year when she hit me with the news just as i was about to come home after 14mnths that she'd been "seeing" another guy.my heart dropped about 20ft,i cried for months and hated her only up until last year or so...after 10yrs of separation and now finally divorced as of last Jan.now i talk to her and am actually happy for her but also vowed i'd never ever ever cheat on any woman i'm with that i was dating seriously.it burns when it's reversed...believe me it burns like molten steel.
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Old 11-19-2013
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I've been cheated on. It's an interesting place to be.
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Old 11-19-2013
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I think most people have been on both sides.
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Old 01-17-2014
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I think cheating is horribly wrong. I think if you want to sleep with other people then don't get into a committed relationship. When I was younger, it was so cool to be with someone and do things behind their back but as an adult, I know how deep connections you can have with a person and wouldn't cheat.
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Old 02-18-2014
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Yes you should not cheat anyone or your wife. You just use your wife to sleep with you on the bed not any one else.
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Old 09-02-2014
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Thank you for sharing and I don't like what you do. Yes, honestly, I want to experience the excitement but the thought that I love my boyfriend and that I don't want him to do the same will be enough to stop me. Just go ahead and find a reason important enough for you to stop what you do.
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Old 11-09-2015
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I don't understand the point of being married then. It's supposed to be a commitment. Why not just stay single then?
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Old 11-19-2015
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Cheating is wrong in my eyes. I have been cheated on and it is the worst betrayal ever. It changes you forever. If you feel the need to cheat then you clearly aren't happy with the person that you are with so you should leave them first. They deserve a chance at happiest too.
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